Two months went by, measured in intervals between time spent with Godwin and Josh. They met up perhaps once a week, sometimes twice if she was lucky. The times she was with Josh under Godwin’s supervision were fantastic. Somehow the mixture of embarrassment, nervousness and heavy petting was incredibly erotic. She and Josh never went all the way, but Josh didn’t seem to mind and they both ended their nights satisfied.
Occasionally she and Godwin would meet up alone, usually at the coffee shop he had taken her to by his house. They would talk, about her life, she would answer questions he had about the City, or questions about her language. She learned that he had been in the human realm for two years, and had picked up most of his English from being here, though he had learned some when he was younger. He had explained to her that SynLilin often briefly visited the human realm to feed, but they usually did not stay for more than a night at a time. When she had asked him how they got here, he easily shifted the subject to another topic. She hadn’t realized it at the time, but every time she tried to bring it up since then he dodged the topic.
The weather had turned, and November was in full force, the days mostly rainy and dreary. All of the leaves had fallen from the trees, and her secret garden was mostly shades of browns and grays, mottled with a few evergreen bushes. Despite the dismal environment, she still ate her lunch in the small park when the weather wasn’t too egregious. Godwin never joined her for lunch, but she liked how she felt when she sat here, as if this spot could somehow connect them.
There was a thick blue satin ribbon tied to the seat of the bench today. It hadn’t been there the day before. She wondered who had left it, if it was a message for someone, or if someone had tied it there whimsically. She sat next to it, careful not to sit on it. It was silky under her fingers as she traced it, wondering who might have left it and why.
She missed Godwin. They were supposed to meet up tonight, and it was driving her to distraction. It had been more than a week since they had met last, and she could feel the beginnings of her hunger stir. More than a week since…her face burned as she remembered how it felt to have Josh ejaculate on her face, his warm fluid splattering sensually across her lips and cheeks. The look on Godwin’s face as he watched her defiled by Josh’s passion was so hot that she came on her own fingers with the smell of his cum thick in her head. She tightened in anticipation of what Godwin might have in store for tonight. She sent Josh a quick text, reminding him of the time and place.
She would meet Godwin here, as they often did. They would both go to dinner with Josh, tonight was at a pizza joint that Josh said was his favorite. Godwin usually didn’t eat, though he would occasionally steal bites from her when Josh wasn’t looking.
She smiled, so totally ready for another night of play. Eager and anticipatory, and yet, Kennedy’s words from a few weeks ago circled in her head. She hadn’t thought too much about them, trying to distance herself from the feelings in her heart that grew every time she saw the beautiful, mysterious incubus. But Kennedy’s intuition about her love for the demon, and about confirming his feelings before she was too deep were making her nervous. The more she tried to ignore it, the worse it got. Lately her chest felt like it would burst from her repressed emotions.
The worst part was, even though she kept telling herself she didn’t love him, or that she never had to tell him, or that it didn’t matter if he loved her as long as they still met up, she couldn’t stand not knowing. Her stomach hurt when she thought about how it might go, how she might ask him about his feelings for her. He was a demon, an incubus, could he even love her? Probably not. She was some boring, plain vampire with baggage, and he was exotic and sexy. He could get any woman in the world to be with him. There was no way he loved her like she loved him.
She sighed heavily, throwing her paper bag and trash from lunch into a receptacle as she trudged back into her job, preparing for four more tedious hours of copy editing before she could rush home and change to get back in time to meet Godwin. She felt like a teenager again, impatient and demanding.
The day moved in glacial speeds. As she sat on the usual bench at the station, waiting for her train to show up and take her home, she noticed another blue satin ribbon tied to a nearby pole, a twin to the one she had seen earlier. On a whim, she clicked a picture of it with her phone just before her train arrived.
During her trip she searched the internet for something that might be occurring with the blue ribbons, but her search was fruitless. She walked home and noticed one more blue ribbon, tied to a power pole a few hundred feet from her apartment, and she snapped a picture of that one, too.
She had a weird feeling about the ribbons, though she didn’t know why. They were probably some new fad, like crochet bombing park benches. Still, they bothered her.
As she prepared for her date, the ribbons slipped from her mind. Godwin had given her directions for how to dress tonight. Black underwear and a plain black dress, or black shirt and skirt. She was not to wear pants, and she was not to wear anything with a speck of color to it. All black tonight, he made her repeat it. Nervous butterflies danced in her stomach as she pulled on her black lycra panties. They were silky against her skin. She longed to feel Godwin’s erection pressed between her cheeks through her panties, wondering how it would feel with the hot length of him sliding up and down between the cleft.
She shook her head, clearing it of thought. She was going to be late if she didn’t move more quickly. She pulled on her black bra, the one that thrust her breasts out appealingly. It wasn’t exactly comfortable, but it made her chest look ample and heaving. The only black dress she had was her funeral dress, and she didn’t think it fit the bill for sexy, so she opted for a lacy black camisole under a v-neck sweater and a black pencil skirt she had for work.
She checked herself over in the mirror with a frown. What did Godwin, or Josh for that matter, see in her? She was plain jane, nothing special, nothing to write home about. And yet, they still seemed genuinely excited to meet up with her again and again. For Josh, she knew he just saw it as a casual affair, so he probably didn’t care that she was so boring, with her short brown hair framing her plain, boring face and her more curvy than slim body.
There was no way Godwin could love her, she decided. He was exotic, an incubus who smelled of vanilla and desert heat, stunning and handsome. He could have any girl he wished. Why was he with her? Was it just convenience? It had to be.
She shook her head, decision made. She wouldn’t ask him, wouldn’t tell him how she felt. She wouldn’t ruin this, she would just enjoy it until he moved on, then she would buy all of the ice cream and binge eat it at home. By herself. Well, not totally by herself. She had Shackles, her snooty persian cat, but he kept to himself mostly. Shackles would probably just ignore her, or even worse, he might come and gloat.
As if her thinking of him was a beacon, he sauntered self-importantly into the room. He meowed demandingly at her and she sighed. “Yes, yes, Shack, I’m coming. I know you haven’t had your fancy food yet today,” she told the cat, heading towards the kitchen. He gave what she imagined was a kitty glare, then followed her at a distance, his tail swishing anxiously.
She fed her petulant cat, him mewling insistently until she placed his dish on the floor before him. “Calm down!” she chided lightly. “You act as if I never feed you!”
Shackles looked up from his bowl long enough to give her another insistent meow. She smiled at her stubborn, demanding cat as he ate his food fast enough to choke on it. She looked up at the clock.
“Oh, snap Shack, I’ve gotta go! I’m gonna be late!” she said, running to put her shoes on. She threw her coat on, hoping that it didn’t violate Godwin’s ‘all black’ dress code, her gray peacoat was the only winter coat she had. There wasn’t time to worry about it now, she told herself. She was out of the house and back at the train stop in record time, panting as she barely caught the train.
As she rode the train she had this weird feeling, as if she was being watched, but no one really seemed to be paying attention to her. She tried to ignore it, reading her phone, but it persisted. She was standing by the door, ready to run from the train, well before they actually arrived at her spot. She nearly ran to their bench, the feeling seeming to follow her.
Godwin was there, waiting for her, and she couldn’t help the big dumb smile and the clenching of her loins at the sight of him. His suit today was all black, with no specks of color, she noticed. Even his accent scarf was black. He smiled back to her, raising his hand in greeting as she rushed over to him. The blue ribbon was still there, tied to the bench.
“Hello, hansa,” he said welcomingly as she approached.
“Hey, Godwin…” she panted as she worked to catch her breath. Even if she was a vampire, she was still out of shape. Maybe if she started running she could rid herself of the extra padding on her belly, hips and thighs. She would start running, working out. She wanted to look good for Godwin. She would start…tomorrow.
“What is wrong?” he asked with concern. “Did you run here?”
She nodded, sitting down next to him. The bench was cold through her skirt but she ignored it. “Oh, I’m sure it’s nothing. I was just creeping myself out is all. Thought I felt something, but it’s probably just in my head.”
“Hmm…” he said thoughtfully. “What kind of feeling?”
She blushed, embarrassed that she was troubling Godwin already. He moved a hand to her thigh and she felt some of her embarrassment abate just from the warmth of his touch. “I guess it felt like I was being watched. I’m sure it’s nothing,” she said, trying to believe it.
He didn’t say anything for a while, just stared off into the distance thoughtfully. “Did you affix this decoration to the bench?” he asked her distractedly.
“Ah, no. I thought it was some type of game or something people play on the internet. Like a scavenger hunt or something. Or maybe just some type of art, something whimsical,” she replied as he untied the ribbon. He bunched it up in his hand, then stood up and walked to the garbage can, thrusting it inside roughly before returning to her
“Ah, is something wrong?” she asked him carefully. She could feel his anger rolling off of him in hot, vanilla scented waves.
He rubbed the scars on the back of his hand roughly. The warm waves of anger disappeared instantly. “No, no, hansa, all is well.” He turned to look at her, his face softening as he took her in. “You have followed my directions?” he asked her, turning his head in consideration.
She blushed under his attentions. “Yes,” she whispered. “I mean, I’m sorry, I only have the one coat, but, I swear everything else is black.”
“Calm, Seneca. Unbutton your coat so that I may see you.” She followed his directions, her hands shaking nervously. “Mmm,” he said seductively. “You look splendid. Your pale skin contrasts with the black so beautifully. Stand up, please, so that I may take you in.”
She squirmed under his attentions, standing up next to him. His eyes were a physical touch, even though it had been too long since she had tasted him last for her to feel his spectral touch. Desire flooded through her, his vanilla scent wrapping around her as he reached out and brushed his fingers across her cheek. His fingers traced over her lips.
She gasped and he stepped forward until there was barely a gap separating the two of them. He pressed his finger more firmly against her lips and she opened her mouth, a shiver going through her body.
She expected him to push his finger into her mouth as he did, expected him to run it over her eyeteeth as he seemed to enjoy, but he didn’t. Instead, he pulled away quickly, looking over his shoulder, that angry look back on his face.
It scared her. Was he mad at her? Had she done something wrong? “I’m sorry, Godwin,” she apologized quickly.
“Shh, hansa,” he said without looking at her. “Come now, we should get going. It is chilly out and we do not wish to keep our Josh Crocker waiting, do we?” He sounded distracted, turning her body with his hands and pushing her to move, one hand on the small of her back. Despite the angry look on his face, his touch was gentle and soft.
She allowed herself to be lead away from their bench, but her feeling of being watched was back. She felt apprehensive, and Godwin’s anger wasn’t helping. She kept looking over her shoulder, expecting to see whatever it was that was distressing the incubus, but she saw nothing out of the ordinary.
They walked two blocks in silence, Godwin’s hand pressed firmly, almost possessively, against the small of her back. He allowed them to slow down when they turned the corner.
“What’s going on, Godwin?” she asked him as he released his hold on her back, moving to walk beside her now in a more normal fashion.
He shook his head. “Nothing to worry you, hansa,” he answered, still distracted.
She frowned, biting the inside of her lip with his dismissal. “What kind of game are we playing tonight?” she asked, changing the subject.
“Just a moment…” he said airily, still checking over his shoulder every few steps.
She bit the inside of her mouth, nibbling the inside of her cheek. He was making her anxious, worried she had done something wrong, though she couldn’t figure out what.
They turned another corner and she sighed audibly when she saw Emil’s Pizzeria on the next corner. A quick glance at her phone confirmed they were a few minutes early. She looked over to Godwin. He still seemed angry, his lips tight and the skin around his eyes creased. “Godwin,” she entreated, taking his hand into hers. He shivered at her touch but didn’t pull away. “Please, what’s wrong?”
He turned back to her and sighed. “It is nothing, hansa, many apologies. I am perhaps overreacting to shadows.” He shook his head, as if clearing it, then turned back to her. He smiled warmly, making her butterflies wriggle pleasantly. “Tonight,” he said, his voice dropping lower so that only she could hear him. “Tonight…what would you like, Seneca?”
“Huh?” she asked dumbly. He never asked her what she wanted to do. He always told her what to do, and she took pleasure in performing for him.
“Well, we have never truly discussed what you desire. What are your desires?” he asked her, moving them both so they were leaning against the brick building across the street from the pizza place. The brick was cold against her palms.
Her anxiety sky rocketed. She couldn’t tell him what she really wanted, she couldn’t. He would leave her. She was too needy, loving him and desiring him, both heart and body. Godwin watched her from the corner of his eye, and she fidgeted until she began to shake from her nerves.
Godwin smiled a half smile, letting her fidget for a while. It went on way too long, him watching her coyly, saying nothing. “Nothing,” she muttered. “Whatever you want.”
He frowned, replacing it with his half smile quickly, but she caught it. “Okay, I will decide. One day, hansa, you will know what you desire. Until then, I will continue to help you discover yourself. Have you been enjoying our play?” he asked her without looking at her.
She nodded, unable to say anything.
Godwin turned to her. “I cannot hear you. Did you respond to me?”
She gulped at the commanding tone he used with her, trying to force herself to answer him. “Y-yes,” she mumbled, looking away from him, so embarrassed.
His fingers trailed across his collar and she eeped outloud. His touch sent a thrill through her, and if the wall wasn’t behind her she would have swooned. Her head tilted, granting him further access to his collar, her core flushing at his touch.
Seneca, he said directly into her mind. Even though they talked like this often, it still made her jump. Would you like a drink before dinner?
God, yes, she wanted a drink before dinner. Ever since she had tasted Godwin’s thick, sweet blood she couldn’t get the taste from her mind. She felt like an addict must, craving his blood, aching for the next taste. She writhed on the wall, unable to answer him, longing to answer him.
“Seneca?” he asked aloud. “Did you hear me?”
She nodded. He said nothing, so then she made herself reply vocally. “Yes, I heard you.”
“Very well,” Godwin replied. “Since you heard me but did not answer my question, that must mean the answer is negative.”
“No! I want-” she barked out, catching herself before she said anything else. She wasn’t supposed to want anything. She was only supposed to follow his orders. She couldn’t allow herself to want anything more from him. Her heart clenched painfully.
His finger hooked under her chin, pulling her so she had to look at him. She didn’t resist him, she couldn’t. She wouldn’t. “Seneca, why does your heart hurt?” he asked her seriously.
She couldn’t look him in the eyes, so she studied his perfect lips and his perfect teeth. She didn’t answer him, for her answer would lead to the end, and she wouldn’t ruin what they had because she was selfish.
He released her chin when she didn’t respond and she looked away again. She could feel his agitation in his touch, but he was still gentle with her. Her heart sank as she realized she was actively disappointing him. “I want to feel you, little hansa. I want you to drink me, and tonight I want you to drink as much as you wish. I will not tell you when to stop.”
“But!” she exclaimed, unsure what she was going to say. He always kept her limited to a certain amount of mouthfuls of his delectable lifeblood.
He put his finger over her lips, like he did before he made them leave the bench. He rubbed it along her lips sensually before pushing into her mouth. She opened up to him and his fingers, as she had anticipated the previous time, went straight to her eyeteeth. She didn’t know how he did it, but every time he stroked her eyeteeth he called her fangs. She felt them lengthen as he stroked them, felt her eyes go red. She also felt her desire surge again, her core tightening.
“No buts, hansa,” he said, pulling her from the wall so that her body was pressed against him. He pushed her head towards his throat. She resisted only for a moment, then relented, pressing her face against his neck, breathing in his vanilla scent. She kissed his throat softly, resting her lips on his pulse.
Still she did not bite. She wanted him, wanted his blood so badly, but she waited for him to give her permission. She waited, but he said nothing. His hands moved, one to her lower back, pushing her body into his, the other trailed along his collar. She shivered as she counted the beats of his heart, waiting for him to grant her permission.
“Why do you delay?” he asked her, tracing small circles into her back.
She pulled away just far enough to answer him. “You didn’t tell me to bite you.”
He sighed heavily and she felt it under her lips as she returned them to his neck. “I will not tell you to bite me this evening, hansa. You bite me if you desire it. You drink me if you thirst for me. I will not tell you what to do in this, not tonight.”
She whined against his throat, afraid to pull away, afraid to bite him.
“No, Seneca. Not tonight. I wish for you to drink me, and to drink as much as you hunger for, but I will not tell you to do so. Tonight I want you to do this because it is what you truly yearn for, not because I command you to do so.”
His contact on his collar was buzzing in her brain. She could feel his concern, and an underlying worry, but more than that she could feel his desire for her to bite him. He traced the collar and she moaned, her eyes rolling back in her head.
And then her fangs were buried in his neck. His pulse pushed hot, thick, vanilla scented blood into her mouth, like warm, creamy vanilla-flavored cocoa. She moaned again, sucking hard. He was so delicious, so perfect in her mouth. Her core flooded with desire as his blood slid down her throat. She wanted him so badly. She had to have him. She pressed herself against him, into his body and he sighed in relief, she could feel it though their connection with his collar.
She lost herself to the pleasure of his blood, never having been permitted to drink so much. She swallowed mouthful after mouthful of Godwin’s essence. If she couldn’t fill herself physically with him, at least she could fill herself with his blood.
Her punctures healed too soon and she whimpered against his skin. He healed quickly, faster than she thought she probably did. He chuckled in his throat, vibrating against her tongue. She rubbed herself again over the bulge in his pants, enjoying the feel of him pressed against her belly.
“Bite me again if you desire,” he said, his voice thick with pleasure, head thrown back against the brick wall. Godwin held her tightly against his body and she wriggled even closer.
His blood hit her veins and she sucked in a deep breath, pushing against him needily as every single cell in her body became super charged. Her core ached for release, she needed it, and he had what she needed. She didn’t care about where they were or what they were doing. She only knew that she needed release and the man pressing against her would fill her so perfectly she would be climbing to the moon as he rode her.
Her hands were fumbling with his belt, and then he was restraining her, her back pressed against his front. His manhood pressed teasingly firm between her butt and she wriggled, enjoying how it felt. It was so close, yet so far away from where she had to have it. God, she needed him, she wouldn’t survive if he wasn’t inside her soon.
“Shh,” he cooed in her ear. “I am so sorry, Seneca. I should have known my blood would do this to you, I did not think…”
“Godwin,” she groaned needily. Her own voice sounded so husky, so horny. “Please, I want you,” she begged, struggling to turn around in his arms.
He held her firmly. “No one wants a scarred incubus, little hansa,” he said sadly. “My blood has forced your desires.”
“I want you!” she insisted, struggling in his arms.
He kissed his collar around her neck and her body stilled even as she longed to keep fighting him. She needed him inside of her. Of course she wanted him. He was all she thought about, all she wanted. She loved him.
“Give it back, Seneca. Feed your extra desire back to me, then we shall meet our Josh Crocker. Give it back to me,” he commanded.
She couldn’t ignore his command. He allowed her slack and she turned quickly in his arms until she faced him.
“I love you, Godwin SynLilin,” she declared passionately before she forced her mouth over his. She pushed her desire at him, and her love. She needed him to feel it and understand her feelings. She needed him to know.
His hands wrapped in her hair and he kissed her as if she were his oxygen. Her core flooded and she pressed herself against him.
And then…everything drained away from her. He pulled hard, scouring her emotions from her more violently that he ever had before. She was dazed by the time he pulled away from her. She had never fed him so much at once, not so quickly. Her head spun and she felt a little empty.
Godwin pressed his forehead to hers, and they stood together, panting as they caught their breath. “My apologies, Seneca. I have…I…I have no excuse. Please, join Josh Crocker now. I need to think. Enjoy your dinner, I have no other orders for you at this time.”
Her heart clenched painfully at his dismissal. Oh god, she had told him. She confessed, and now she ruined everything. Why had she told him?
She swallowed hard, trying to find words, but found none. She should have felt more, felt loss and depression and embarrassment, but she just felt vague emotions, still numb from Godwin’s intense feeding. He looked at her questioningly, then looked towards the pizzeria. Nodding, she allowed him to lead her to the brightly lit pizzeria, still confused as to what just happened.
Dreadfully Erotic 